Relate Mid and East surrey FAQ
We’re the UK’s largest provider of relationship support, and every year we help over a million people of all ages, backgrounds and sexual orientations to strengthen their relationships.
FAQs
We’ve collected the most commonly asked questions about Relate and our counselling services. If you have a general question about our services, it’s covered here.
Relationship Counselling
Relate counselling is completely confidential. We will not give your name or any information about you to anyone outside Relate unless someone’s personal safety is at risk.
Counselling helps you take time out from your situation and see it from a fresh perspective. Working with a counsellor gives you, or you and your partner, a chance to think about what you can do to change your situation for the better. It can also give you a chance to explore complex or difficult issues in a safe and confidential environment.
Relate are concerned with all aspects of relationship counselling. If you have a problem which is directly connected to your current relationship, a past relationship or to forming new relationships then Relate can help you to work through the issues surrounding it.
Relate can help in a number of ways. It can help to restore communication between you and your partner, address issues from previous relationships which are affecting your current situation and develop increased confidence to deal with any future problems as they arise.
Yes. Whether you are single, or if you have a partner who doesn’t want to come or you simply want to discuss things alone you are welcome to bring any aspect of your current, past or future relationships to Relate by yourself.
Relate always welcomes feedback and is keen to improve its services. We have a complaints procedure which aims to make the process straightforward and fair. Should you wish to make a complaint, in the first instance, please raise it with the manager of the service.
Your complaint or concerns will be investigated and you will receive a reply within four weeks.
We work with all people, including individuals and those in same-sex relationships. The minimum age to apply for Relate couples counselling is 16 but there is no upper age limit. Young people’s counselling is available to those aged above 11 years.
Relate helps lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender couples and individuals with building stronger relationships. We can help with the issues that affect the LGBT+ communities, from the big problems that might threaten your relationship and have a big effect on you and your family to smaller issues that just make things a little less than perfect. Even if things are going brilliantly for you, we can help keep it that way.
As each person’s situation is vastly different from the next, we cannot give an average number of sessions. Your slot is yours for as long as you need it. Some people find that one or two sessions will help them work through their problems and help them to move forward, while others may find they need to attend for several months.
Sex Therapy
In sex therapy you and the therapist work with the problems you have identified. The therapist will design a programme of exercises especially for you and you will be asked to do specific exercises at home. At your sessions, the therapist will discuss your progress with the exercises and the best next steps for you. You will never be asked to undertake any sexual tasks during the sessions.
Relate deals with every client’s situation individually and the length of time a course of therapy takes depends on your circumstances. Sessions are usually weekly and therapists always work at your pace, not to a timetable, so you will never feel rushed or obliged to come back unnecessarily.
Sex therapy can help where people have ‘gone off’ sex – lack of desire is the most common problem for female clients. It can also help with problems such as erectile dysfunction or if sex is painful, where this is not caused by a medical condition. If you meet with a sex therapist they will advise you if any other agencies are better placed to help you.
Sex therapy can be very successful in helping people re-establish an active sex life. 93% of people who have completed Relate sex therapy said they felt their sexual relationship improved after using the service*. Working with a Relate sex therapist will help you to overcome the problems you’re having and find a way to move on from them.
* Statistic from Relate Internal Research: 1998/99
No. Many people are referred to sex therapy by their GP but you can also make an appointment with Relate to discuss any aspect of your sex life or relationship without a referral.
Yes, if you are single, or if your partner doesn’t want to come along, or if you simply want to see a Relate sex therapist alone.
All Relate sex therapists are qualified in couples counselling having undertaken training for two to three years. They then undertake further specialist training in sex therapy.
Your Relate Centre may talk to you about seeing a ‘sex-therapist-in-training’. These are fully qualified Relate counsellors who are receiving additional training in sex therapy and close professional support. All Relate counsellors and therapists continue with ongoing training and consultation with other professionals to ensure they give you the highest standard of service.
Young People’s Counselling
Our YPC counsellors have been trained specifically to help children affected by the breakdown of a relationship within the family. We offer a listening service to those between the ages of 11 and 25. YPC can help your child to understand the way they are feeling about their situation and to develop coping strategies, while building their self-confidence for the future.
YPC clients are treated with the same confidentiality as those attending couple counselling or sex therapy. While it may be possible for you to pass on information that you feel your child’s counsellor will find helpful, their counsellor cannot discuss any aspect of their case with you. Breaking the confidentiality would break the bond of trust between client and counsellor.
We ask for a contribution of £43 for every YPC session. However, if there are financial concerns then we may be able to help fund the sessions.
Family Counselling
We use a carefully planned assessment to identify whether Relate is the most appropriate agency to provide this help for you, or whether another source would be more appropriate.
Family Counselling is open to couples and other family members seeking help with their family difficulties. ‘Family members’ could be parents, children, siblings or extended family, including those from different generations and blended families.
You may gain an increased understanding to make choices about how you manage your relationships within the family setting, develop more effective ways of managing areas of difficulty within the family, and develop better communication, both within a couple relationship and across generations. We can also offer information on other courses of help which may further improve your situation.
We often offer Family Counselling to assist family members who are experiencing some difficulties in their relationships with one another.
Education & Learning (Workshops)
Workshops and courses are run by qualified trainers who are also qualified counsellors. Their approach is sensitive, understanding and non-judgemental.
Generally you will be together with 8 to 12 people at a similar life stage. However, we do have some courses that are run in schools & colleges and some professional courses that are much larger. Course materials are based on modern adult learning principles. During the course you may take part in group discussions, case studies, questionnaires, games or a variety of other tasks. Some courses for professionals include role-play elements in order to practise essential skills.
Yes, most of our courses and workshops are for individuals. However, the Couples Course requires both partners to attend. Increased benefit can be gained if both parents attend the Parents Apart workshops.
Contact Relate Mid & East Surrey
Learn more or make an appointment:
- Reigate 01737 245212
- Epsom 01372 722976